The Blame Game: Why Pointing Fingers Keeps Us Divided

Divide and conquer.  Was it originally from Sun Tzu, Machiavelli, or Julius Caesar?  We are not sure. Or is it simply embedded deep in our DNA? We divide, primarily by blame. Blame the other. He did it. She touched me. Adam blamed Eve and really blamed God as well (“the woman YOU gave me”). Eve blamed the serpent. The biblical stories go on and on, with blame often central. 

I don’t know about all of history, so maybe things aren’t so different. Maybe the difference is the tools by which we can blame others, namely the internet, social media, and the like. But listen to the blame. When there is a shooting, and there are more and more, the first response is no longer to argue about gun control or policies, but rather to try to identify “whose side” the shooter was on. Everyone does this. What was written on the shell casings?  What did he (and it is usually a he) have on his social media? What hat did he wear? How did he vote? It can get ridiculous.  In the meantime, violence continues, and people don’t look for real ways to address the carnage. 

The government shuts down. Whose fault is it? Polls tell us this percentage of Americans blame one side or the other; in the meantime, government services are not available, and lives are hurt. 

And right now, right now, I bet there are those reading this who are thinking: Yeah, well, it’s “their” fault that all this blame is central to our culture. 

How ironic. 

Everyone knows that in a relationship, marriage or otherwise, blame is destructive. It’s HIS fault we don’t talk. It’s HER fault we argue. Blame. Or use the example of any sports team. If any teammate just blames the other, they lose. They just do. 

And sometimes, we even blame God. 

So, we begin worship with what? Confession. We must examine ourselves, our hearts, our passions, and yes, our hurts and pains that often fuel the blame we throw like arrows at others. 

"The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, but in ourselves". So says Cassius to Brutus in  Act 1, Scene 2 of Shakespeare's play Julius Caesar. 

There is, as the expression goes, plenty of blame to go around. There is also plenty of responsibility. Do I wish our politicians of all irks would take more responsibility and work for the good of all? Most certainly. Unfortunately, I don’t know what I can do to change them. In the meantime, maybe I can examine what I do, and say, and think, that adds blame rather than healing in the lives of others. 

What do you think?